The One With The Grill
(Wherein I mock myself)

I have yet to write the “omigod I love my grill entry” so let’s start this Sunday morning off there, shall we?

I love my grill. That having been said, I’m also an overzealous moron determined to burn the complex down on a near daily basis.

Okay, that’s a little bit of an exaggeration but for the last week I’ve grilled just about everything we’ve eaten, with varying degrees of success and have made a mess of charred newspaper pieces out of the back patio, as wind gusts rocked my chimney starter while I insisted on grilling during a rain storm.

I have butch grill tools. I have a big kettle-shaped griller/smoker. I have Cowboy Charcoal. And for one very exciting day, I had a Polder Meat Thermometer.

You might be wondering why the thermometer had but a cameo in my first week of grilling. And I’ll tell you why. Magnets.

My fabulous probe thermometer came with the one feature I demanded in my search for accurate ways of monitoring the internal temperature of my potentially lethal and trichynosis inducing pork–it came with magnets. Magnets affixed to it’s bottom to allow attachment to metal surfaces, such as the oven, the fridge, your spatula I suppose. Not, however, the lid of your grill.

What seemed like a perfect way of watching the steady progress of my first round of bratwurst (prepared using the “indirect” method of grilling, wherein the coals rest to either side of the food, which lays across the grates above a drip pan) resulted in the complete destruction of my brand-spanking new, just out of the package, thermometer.

The truly amazing part of the process was that apart from not trusting the rapid rise of the temperatur readout during the proceedings (I just figured I didn’t have the probe inserted properly) the thermometer gave no indication of its suffering. That is until I attempted to remove it from the grill. At that point it more or less spontaneously combusted in my hand.

So I will once again be without a thermometer for a little while longer but I believe an important lesson has been learned here. Magnets are bad.

The Food

Here’s what I’ve cooked so far:

Grilled Chicken: A tad dry but not bad.
Strip steaks: Boring but I blame the cut of meat.
Grilled Veggies: Very nice.
Corn: Decent.
Lamb Chops: Amazing. Literally the biggest success on the grill so far.
Rosemary New Potatoes: Also amazing.
Ribeye Steaks w/grilled bread: Good but not outstanding.
Grilled Shrimp w/lime and salt & pepper: A good appetizer but easy to over cook.
Brats: Despite the thermometer disaster, these came out really well.

Also, I have to say that Jennifer made a remarkable fruit salad last night to go with dinner. It came out very nicely. AND she baked cookies. The Morrison women will become cooks worthy of our grandmothers yet.

So, as you can see, I’ve been very busy with the grill. I’ve got more chicken, and also hamburgers and hotdogs to do sometime this week.

Today, however, Jennifer, Chris, Tanya and myself will be dining at the illustrious home of my paternal grandparents. My grandmother has complained to me at least three times about the fact that I still have an Atlanta cell phone number, thereby inflicting long distance charges on her when she wants to reach me. Anyone want to bet she’ll say something about it again today?