Survivor: Lesbos

What in the frickety heck is going on with this season of Survivor? There is some seriously bizarre lesbian business happening this time around and I was going to skip blogging about it but decided after this morning’s political rant we could use some lighter fare here.

As far as I’m aware, there is only one contestant who is openly lesbian on the show, and she is this 60 year-old earth mother-granola-hippy woman called “Scout.” Then there’s this hard-boiled redneck woman named Twila who works on a construction crew, but she’s not gay, or at least she was trying to convince someone of that last night by saying “each to his own but no thank you” when a guy suggested that she might want to enjoy the attentions of Amy, who is the most perplexing of this group’s females.

Julie is all about using sex appeal to snowball the men. I get her and I get her playing along with Amy. Amy I don’t get. Either she is just a complete man-hating femi-nazi (she is ruthlessly determined to have an all female victory) or she’s a power tripping lesbian trying to make all the women worship her. Either way, she is f’d in the head. Last night she and Julie and Leann were body painting each other on the beach and while I’ll admit, it was kinda hot, it was really weird. The guys were like, “uhm, half-naked hot chicks painting each other’s bodies!!! Wait, are they gay? What’s going on here?”

And please don’t take this to mean I don’t like Amy, because oddly enough, I do. I just can’t figure her out to save my life and her motivations kinda scare me.

And Scout, who is so damn sincere and naive, actually said that she was glad when the tribes merged because she missed Twila so so much, “I missed her in places I can’t talk about.”

I just about fell on the floor.