Past the Mission

“i don’t believe i went too far
i said i was willing
she said she knew what my books did not
i thought she knew what’s up

past the mission
behind the prison tower
past the mission
i once knew a hot girl

past the mission
they’re closing every hour
past the mission
where i, smell the roses

she said they all think they know him well
she knew him better
everyone wanted something from him
i did too but i shut my mouth
he just gave me a smile

hey they found a body
not sure it was his
still they’re using his name
and she gave him shelter
and somewhere i know she knows
somewhere i know she knows
some things only she knows

past the mission
behind the prison tower
past the mission
i once knew a hot girl

past the mission
they’re closing every hour
past the mission
where i, smell the roses.”

–Tori Amos

[Edit] Writing these lyrics just threw me back about 10 years to the night somebody thrust this CD into my hands at a club. Ben, Gina, Max and I had gone out that night, I won’t even try to guess the year, and this Tampa club was fairly new at the time and damned if I can remember what it was called. Anyway, they were giving out free CDs and some kind of shot and everybody in the place was rolling on E, which was the newly popular designer drug of the day.

This club was also the first of its kind that I’d experienced–very heavy trance mix with cage dancers and go-go boys and people doing illicit things in hallways (much like the club scenes from Queer as Folk). Gina and I got worn out pretty quickly but none of us could find Ben. We sat outside on the street for ages waiting on him to materialize and very nearly called a cab and left without him. Wouldn’t have been the first time.

Anyway, I got this CD, Under the Pink: Live, that night and honestly, I kinda looked at it like it had the plague. I knew three things about Tori Amos at the time–she played the piano like she was making out with it, she was considered somewhat radical, and my sister Emily loved her. And since I had gone through a fairly lengthy period of trying to disassociate myself from anything my sister liked, Tori was not on my playlist.

Eventually though, I gave in and listened to it. And despite my initial trepidation, I fell for it and it went into constant rotation. It’s still the only Tori Amos cd I own and its songs are just about the only ones I’m familiar with. But they were the right songs at the right time.