December 12: Ghetto Style
By AmyMo on Dec 12, 2006 in Life
I have PMS.
Go ahead, snicker. I will kick YOUR ASS!
Anyway. I am also broke–it being the Christmas season and all. Well, that and I spent a good portion of November acting like Money and then went and had a little retail therapy to boot. Did I mention I bought a new phone?
Again with the digressions.
So Saturday night at the company holiday party I won a random drawing for a BP Gift Card. Everyone is all, “Whoo-hoo! free gas!” And yes, I know, gas prices are high and going up. And yes, the truck takes and uses more gas than I’m used to. However. My head did this, “oooh, they sell beer and snacks up to the BP!”
So like I said, I have PMS. And tonight, my BP card purchased the following items: 1 six pack of beer. 1 Slim Jim. 1 Chug of Vitamin D Milk (to be used on cereal). 1 bag sour cream n’ onion chips.
Shut-up. You’ve been there.
I am a self-indulgent, financially irresponsible moron. This is not news.
We form habits though, when we’re young. The Hollands will know what I mean when I talk about the Finch. That damn store was the bright and shining spot in most of my school days from 7th to 8th grade. I did not enjoy junior high. It was more-or-less a misery. One that I am well and truly over by this point in my life and yet, like I said, we form habits. And comfort in the form of junk food is a hood-rat habit I am willing to own.
Seventh grade was about the time I demanded an allowance for household services rendered. (Don’t laugh, I earned that $10. By kicking my sister’s ass and occasionally running the sweeper.) An allowance meant I had whole dollars! Whole dollars bought pockets full of joy at the Finch in 1985. Jolly Ranchers, Now ‘N Laters, Tootsie Rolls, Cheese Doodles, shaving cream (heh).
We do eventually learn priorities. I may have spent the majority of my allowance on ghetto snacks but I do pay my rent, most of my bills, my taxes, etc. I am reasonably adult. But I can still kill some Now ‘N Laters when I’m in a bad mood.
And tonight I have PMS. And I’m broke. And I have a loaded BP Card. And I WILL kick your ass.
Anybody want some chips?
at least the PMS should be done by Christmas-Thank you Lord!
Mom | Dec 12, 2006 | Reply
Watch it! You’re my mother but I will still kick your ass!
AmyMo | Dec 12, 2006 | Reply
kidding!
AmyMo | Dec 12, 2006 | Reply
haha
Mom | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
I want some chips only can we make them BBQ????
Jennifer | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
Cool Ranch Doritos?
I had about the same experience, only it was the Plez U that was my source of fatty, sugary comfort as soon as I was old enough to walk down Pendleton Road to spend my allowance ($10? I don’t think I ever got $10!)
Elizabeth | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
i think you might enjoy a burger king chicken sandwich with cheese. glorious cheese!
glad i’m in seattle where you can’t reach my ass.
samantha | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
Forget the chips, I want some of that Slim Jim!
Jen Z. | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
Brilliant entry. But then, you seldom disappoint.
Mark | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
Oh, and I forgot to say that I KNOW you WILL kick my ass.
Mark | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
Ahh, the Finch. Home of the Hostess pudding pie, Chick o stix and the 16 oz Cokes in real glass bottles.
Sadly, they demolished the Finch several years ago, and the land is now a grassy field owned by Agnes Scott College. And they call that progress.
Geoffrey | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
i have pms and i want MUNCHO’s.
towanda aka Koo-koo Pants | Dec 13, 2006 | Reply
I just checked. You can’t kick my ass from Ohio.
Scopi | Dec 17, 2006 | Reply
Scott, Scott, Scott. How long have we known each other? Oh wait, what’s that line from Jurassic Park? “Life finds a way.”
AmyMo | Dec 18, 2006 | Reply