On Saturday I sucked it up and went to an authorized Sprint Repair Center about my phone.

I told the guy, “I can hear them but they can’t hear me. My mother is irritated. Make it stop.”

So he looked at the phone, took the battery out, looked up my account, then said, “Okay, we’ll order a replacement, I don’t have any in stock. It will take about three days.”

That was pretty much the entire conversation apart from me pleading with him to make sure it’s the same phone and not one of equal or greater value, as promised.

Yesterday he called to say it was in so I drove down last night and picked it up.

The Good:
This cost me nothing.
It is the same phone, exactly, only new.
It was fast and almost painless.

The Bad:
All of my customizations are gone of course. This means I have to relearn how to change all of my settings, find all my ringers again and re-upload them, reteach my T9 words like, “bummer, blop, ridonkulous, etc.” and retype all my urls into my web browser and set new bookmarks.

The Ugly:
According to the guy, my phone was apparently “so messed up that the data got corrupted and I couldn’t completely transfer your contacts.”

What this means to you:
I now have 100+ phone numbers in my new phone and not a single NAME associated with any of them.

Ironic that I can finally carry on audible conversations over my cell phone again–BUT! I can’t actually call anyone.

So I have mystery phone book. You’re probably in it. But I have no idea because it’s been more than 10 years since I memorized a phone number.

If I’m in your phone? Chances are you’re in mine but unless you text me your name or call me, it could be a while before I find you again.

Just sayin.